The Big Bird in the room – my silver hair turned yellow from heat damage

Ever had the demon barber dream – where you’re strapped to a salon chair and your hair is smeared with ‘Medium Brown’ box dye? Well, I sleepwalked into the hellfire hairdresser nightmare. My delicate silvers clamped in a ‘Prisoner Cell Block H’ steam press, operated my a maniacal Queen Bea, as I cheer: “Please, Miss. Can I have some more?” There’s unsightly yellow hair where shining silver once resided. My crowning glory has been cremated by a sadistic rogue stylist…

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Poem – Stripped

I stripped my hair colour with great devotion,Using a skull and crossbones type potion.This paint stripper ripped the dye out – how lucky,But it turned my hair brittle orange, like Chucky. Coated my head Mahogany in hasty defence,As easy as creosoting the partition fence. I stripped my hair of health and vitality,Force fed it chemicals, faced time for GHD.Devoid of shine with sparse natural movement,It was no longer grey, which was an improvement. The colours did not enhance or improve,They…

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Poem – “Have you let yourself go?”

“Have you let yourself go?” My friend asks, stroking my hair.”Yes I have,” I reply, to her disappointed glare.”Never mind,” she says quickly. “Let’s get this grey mess corrected.”Frog marched to the salon, her own demons projected. “Have you let yourself go?” My aunt accuses, controlling.”Yes I have,” I declare, her beady eyes rolling.She adds: “This is one mistake you can forget.We’ll soon have you back to that lovely brunette.” “Have you let yourself go?” the stylist asks with pity.”What…

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Colourful clothes to complement silver hair

Or, ‘Do I look like a children’s entertainer?’ Let me preface this blog by saying that there’s nothing wrong with children’s entertainers. From Timmy Mallett and Derek Griffiths, to Floella Benjamin and Mr Tumble, animated children’s TV presenters (UK) have entertained my children and me for years. Their bright clothes and jolly persona radiate joy and positivity. In stark contrast to me, Anna the Goth, who has hidden behind a costume of black since discovering ‘The Cure’ at 15 and…

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Poem – What Will Happen?

What will happen if you ditch the dye,If you give your natural colour a try?If you fly in the face of outdated notionsThat youth is preserved by toxins and potions? What will happen if you say “I quit!”?A conscious uncoupling – because you’re worth it.Your glow comes from outside of the box,It knows no number, it’s never low in stocks. What will happen if you forget to attend,Your weekly session with ‘Chestnut 634′ this weekend?No longer held to others’ standard…

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Hair to the Throne

As ‘House of the Dragon’ and ‘The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power’ hit our screens, there’s an overload (or is that overlord?) of silver hair. From Princess Rhaenyra’s lustrous locks to Saruman the White’s flowing mane, silver hair makes quite the entrance. On Facebook, one silver sister group member proudly proclaimed that a stranger had asked her: “Do you have Targaryen ancestry?” Fire, blood, and bubble baths In the ‘Game of Thrones’ saga, the Targaryen dynasty bear…

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Dear Anna – silver hair advice for my younger self

Imagine if you had a time machine and could revisit your younger self. After admiring the elasticity of your skin, the unmistakable glow of youth and a visible waistline, your eyes (now bespectacled, in my case) focus on a glossy head of naturally brown hair. The kind…
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Poem – My Hair, Dyed

Introduction I wrote this poem as an apology to my long-suffering hair. It’s endured much abuse over the last 30 years or so (since I discovered my first grey at 19). Highlights, straighteners, perms, bleach, ammonia, tongs, heated rollers, hair stripper – to name a few of the torture methods. I have fine hair, so when I stepped up my highlighting routine to cover the grey, every five weeks, my poor hair gave up the ghost and snapped. I’ve previously…

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